RELATIONSHIP

Communication is more than just talking and listening. Communication takes place best in the context of a caring, good relationship. To have a good relationship you need to invest time. Remember: Relationship = Good Time - Bad Time.

SPEND at least 15 minutes each day with each child playing and having fun. Be noncritical and accepting.

BODY LANGUAGE

Communication takes place by more than words; the way we laok and what we do often communicate more than words. Spending time with your child communicates caring, love and respect.

STOP what you're doing when talking to your child, look directly at the child and be attentive to their body language, Remember, you may need to do more and talk less!

LISTENING

Listening lets your child know that you understand how they feel. Use active listening when your child is displaying emotion because it involves hearing the child's feelings and restating them so that the child feels understood. Avoid nagging, threatening or lecturing.

LISTEN for your child's feelings, give open responses that invite them to keep talking. Use one of these phrases, "Sounds like you're...", "I can see that you're...", "Could it be that you're..."

EXPRESSING YOUR IDEAS

When you want to communicate your feelings you can use an "I-message." This tells your child how their behavior effects you and how you feel about it. Be careful to keep a neutral tone of voice.

USE AN "I-MESSAGE" to tell a child how you feel about their behavior. An "I-message" contains three parts,

"When you..."       describe child's behavior

"I feel..."               your feeling

"because..."          consequence of child's behavior.

1. Impact of Parenting Styles

2. A Quick Reminder

3. Please, Just Listen

4. Positive Parenting

5. Things Kids Really Want

6. A Report Card for Parents